Sunday, February 19, 2006

If I had a nickel for every visit to my blog

...I'd have about $48.75.

Which, coincidentally, is exactly the upper limit of what would be offered should anyone put a out a fatwa on my ass. (A fatwa on the rest of me would fetch another $18.50. Proportionally speaking, my ass is very valuable.)

Also, $48.75 happens to be just enough coin to buy two of these or two of these, both of which I'll have to keep in mind as possible elements of a Kinsella-Bourrie solution.

But I digress. The point is that I'm closing in on my 1000th visitor. Four digits. The big One Grand. The perfect number for a lameass political slogan about "points of light". Surely, 1000 must be a milestone. I mean, some people get a measly 919 hits and call that a record.

So maybe I should stay up waiting for the magic moment. Put on a pot of coffee, watch a few infomercials, maybe look up some more sites about that 919 thing. Or maybe not. At my rate of traffic, I'd be up all night. Er, and the next. Tuesday -- it couldn't take past Tuesday, could it? Anyway, that's more caffeine, food dehydrators and porn academically justifiable sexuality research than even I can handle.

So it's off to bed with me, where I'll have dreams of being, very soon, a (sigh) blog-thousandaire. And ma said I'd never amount to nothing!

Shit, I hope I don't have to give out a frigging prize.

UPDATE Sunday 9:34 am: (Doing my best Sally Field) You like me, you really like me! Thanks to the Good Queen of the South, Miss Cellania, for loaning me some traffic.


At February 19, 2006 5:05 a.m., Blogger Miss Cellania said...

OK, you would not believe how hard it was for me to load this long enough to comment. Blogger still hates me, so I read you and many others through Bloglines. I don't much mind being called the Princess of Darkness, but I would prefer you to spell my name right!

Am I the 1000th hit? That would be so exciting! I have no idea who my thousandth was, since I didn't get a sitemeter til much later. Most milestones pass me by like a joke you don't get.

At February 19, 2006 9:28 a.m., Blogger Havril said...

I spelled you wrong? Oops. This is why I need an editor. I'll get on that. Glad you are okay with the Princess of Darkness bit. I figured that it would be so obviously untrue that you'd be okay with it. If you are not at all, let me know and it's gone.

I don't know if you were the 1000th, but let's pretend you were. The boxers are in the mail.

At February 19, 2006 3:14 p.m., Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Havil: Miss Cellania sent me over to rub your nose in my 50,000 comments.

(No she didn't. You write well, sir. Keep it up.)

At February 19, 2006 6:53 p.m., Blogger Miss Cellania said...

Havril, we gotta get you some PR lessons. My site is only a couple months older than yours, and I get that many hits every week.

And I was sure you were a lawyer!

At February 19, 2006 7:47 p.m., Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Oh, forgot to tell you: You're pretty interesting, so I will be back.

We can all join Missy C. in getting you more well known. There's gotta be a way....

At February 19, 2006 9:32 p.m., Blogger Havril said...

PR. As in Proportional Representation, right? I don't know how that's going to help, but...

At February 19, 2006 9:34 p.m., Blogger Havril said...

Oh, and as for the vicious lawyer accusation... I can't confirm or deny that. But I do play one on Cable Access TV. Please don't let Dick Cheney shoot me.


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