And he emerged, not unlike a dusty Mike Brady at the end of A Very Brady Christmas

Despite rumours to the contrary -- and those secret messages you think you hear when you play your old Mini Pops records backwards -- I am not dead. (Note to my family: this means I'll need my CDs back. Weren't you even going to wait to find my body? I am so changing my Will.)

So stay tuned, dear reader, for exciting new posts that will make you laugh, cry, and above all ponder the great issues of the day. Such as...

• The Barbapapa Genome Project: Good Science, or Squishful Thinking?
• If This is the Year of the Dog, Shouldn't I be Checking the Bottom of My Shoe? and
  
• Why Every White Male Really, Really Wants to Be Oprah.

And much, much more. Just watch me.

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