Tuesday, April 11, 2006

This is nothing, really

To twist the words inscribed on Stockwell Day's favourite pewter bookmark, let me say this: Seven days with no blogging makes one weak.

Not Horshack from 'Welcome Back Kotter' weak, but pretty weak. Think of an accountant who just gave blood but said no to the cookies and oj. Yeah, so that's the level of energy I bring to the blogosphere right now.

So, in the interest of putting you all on notice that I am not completely dead, I give you the tried and true non-post post. Or...

TOP 8 REASONS WHY I HAVEN'T BEEN BLOGGING MUCH LATELY

8. Belinda's decision to not seek the Liberal leadership hit me really hard, and Peter MacKay's potato patch doesn't have WiFi access.

7. I think I might have cut off a Bandido on the 407 a couple of years back. I'm keeping a low profile until it blows over.

6. My conditioner bottle said "rinse, repeat". It didn't say how many times.

5. My campaign to draft John McCallum is floundering. (And after I blew $19.95 on a sweet domain name.)

4. Enriching uranium is harder than you'd think. (Gholam Reza Aghazadeh -- complete asshole to work for.)

3. Well, it's all very complicated. You see, Scofield can't remember parts of the prison schematics where his tattoo got burned off, and the Warden transferred him to solitary because he wouldn't answer questions about the bit of guard's uniform found embedded in his wound, leaving Sucre to conceal the hole in the guard's break room. Are you following me?

2. Priorities, man. That turkey pepperoni's not going to eat itself.

And the number one reason I haven't been blogging much lately...

1. I'll put in more effort when the Canucks do.


Real posts to follow. Eventually.
*

7 Comments:

At April 11, 2006 6:00 PM, Blogger Alison said...

Oh...You're back.
I thought you and K-Doh were going on the road to sell flipper slippers.
No, I only just got here myself.
Kind of a mess in here after the big 'We'll always have Cancun' throwdown.
How come all your fish are covered in Astroglide?

 
At April 11, 2006 7:14 PM, Anonymous Cameron said...

No, no, no -- this post still had some thought put into it. The non-post posts are those in which one just pastes in the "answer" to an Internet quiz. (So if I eat Cherry Garcia ice cream, does that mean I'll go blind?)

 
At April 11, 2006 7:14 PM, Blogger Havril said...

Kind of a mess in here after the big 'We'll always have Cancun' throwdown.

Some folks talked about throwing up. But 'throwdown'? Surely I'd have remembered a throwdown.

 
At April 11, 2006 7:21 PM, Blogger Havril said...

Cameron, you assume I had to think to come up with that post. In actual fact, I did that one blindfolded and typing with my feet. It was all random keystrokes. True talent finds a way, I guess.

And this blog is never about answers.

 
At April 12, 2006 4:40 AM, Blogger K-Dough said...

But aren't all posts really non-posts though? Turkey salami? Sheesh, you low-fat west coasters make me sick.

Go Habs!

 
At April 12, 2006 9:11 PM, Blogger Harding said...

Your reasons are satisfactory to us, but one. The Bandidos are hardly a threat anymore, unless you have stock in a tow-truck.

Otherwise, you are free to eat turkey, enrich uranium, and have fun with your prison buddies...

H-

 
At April 17, 2006 8:42 AM, Blogger Gentleman-hobbs said...

By Jove I hardly know you well enough to comment young man! However as Father Attader Vinegar-Stroke says (oh yes the internet surfer supreme) let your consciense decide. I have a bit of a dilemna myself here too do I go for the cake on the table or the tart on the floor. Enjoyed the blog though

 

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